Splice review

What is happening in the cinema world right now is fucking awesome. Despite all the massive, massive amounts of crap being tossed out there and the usual junk food pictures there is people at work attempting to revive the science fiction and horror genres. Some of these people you know like Oscar nominated filmmaker Neil Blomkamp of "District 9" or Duncan Jones of "Moon". However some have been hard at work attempting to bring us smart and original ideas for a while. People like Vincenzo Natali. Natali created "Cube" in the late 90's; a Kafka-like psychological science fiction picture about people trapped in a giant cubic puzzle. After that he somewhat disappeared only really popping up once more on my radar for his directed piecein "Paris Je T'aime" which was among my favorites. All the while he was cracking the story that would eventually become "Splice".

Is it really horror? Not by the conventional thought of stuff jumping out and all that, but instead something very, VERY close to his and executive producer Guillermo Del Toro's feelings on horror, science and monsters. Del Toro is well known for of course the "Hellboy" films and "Pan's Labyrinth" however people tend to forget his bizarre vampire tale "Cronos" (which is getting the Criterion treatment soon), the war ghost story "The Devil's Backbone" or his homage to Universal movie monster favorite "The Mummy", his mega roach monster film "Mimic". Aside from that the man is a fucking Cronenberg junkie and obviously Natali is as well; something very evident here.

What the film is really about is Clive (Adrian Brody) and Elsa (Sarah Polley), a rock star bioengineering team who have cracked DNA splicing and want to step it up a notch. So they do. From dealing with animal DNA, to tossing in some human DNA and the result is Dren. Clive fears what they've created and often speaks of destroying it however Elsa continuously reminds him of all that they could learn from her and eventually come to possibly love their creation. Dren is genetically a dozen different animals which allows from some fun and mildly tense sequences of discovery involved them dealing with her. But like most mad scientist creations something goes pretty wrong. Dren ages quickly and within a few months she appears to be in her mid twenties. She's tired of being cooped up in basements, labs and barns and wants out and that's the last thing Elsa or Clive want. Also as time progresses more and more is learned about her genetics as well as subtle hints about one of the character's childhood. For me much of what happens near the end of the second act play strongly into the things we are never told about this character's past and family life and why they might act the way they do.

"Splice" then uses it's final act to go for the gut and go out there. Creepily out there with stuff you've definitely not seen in modern horror. My friends we have entered Cronenberg-land. It's a wonderful place full of bizarre, skin crawling things that play more into ideas and morals and less into just straight gore. In fact there isn't much gore in the film at all, but it does warrent it's R-rating. I dare not spoil anything major and really do ask people to give this a shot, especially if you profess to like sci-fi movies or horror movies. Nowadays we mainly get remakes, torture porn or straight forward gore pictures. It's rare to find original, intelligent, disturbing horror pieces that don't need to relay on half-assed tricks to get viewers. Granted A LOT of people will probably not like this film, but that's honestly because they've promoted this to seem very much like a basic horror film and that's what they want to see. Those viewers are the reason we have so many damn "Saw" films in the world. No taste for the truly bizarre and disturbing, just for mindless gore and stupid traps. Let me just say that Cronenberg's "The Brood" is smarter and creepier than any of the "Saw" pictures.

I know I could repeat that last bit over and over again till my fingers bleed, but it's the truth and honestly I know this film won't to be major success. It's too strange for mainstream audiences that want movies like lunch meat. They want simplicity, easy understanding and whatever is the flavor of the month aka funny zombie movies. Being a horror fan it does piss me off to high heavens, but fuck all I can do about it. All I can say is that "Splice" goes to places few horror movies go to anymore and has fun with it. It's not a heavy-handed morality tale of why you shouldn't play God and it's not a brainless monster movie. It's "Frankenstein" mixed with "Cronos" with a scoop of "Dead Ringers".

Hot Tub Time Machine review

Is it possible that in a world where we have shit comedies throughout the entire year, that a film with such a ridiculous title and premise could be not only entertaining and funny, but in fact an all around great comedy? I ask this pretending as if I wasn't sold on the movie from the first time I watched the original redband teaser which had Craig Robinson screaming about 'Terminator' with cocaine all over his face. Ok "Hot Tub Time Machine" isn't some masterpiece of cinema and nor was it ever destined for that, but it is a great comedy that's original and relentlessly entertaining.

I should also state that this film is made by the same team that brought us "Grosse Point Blank" and my favorite Cusack picture, "High Fidelity", so that too was something that ran through my mind when factoring in what could this be like. Cusack plays the kind of guy that he's great at playing, snarky, alone and somewhat depressed, but never so gone that he would admit to being depressed. Beyond that he's just a fun dude to watch on screen because he lacks that 'I'm a big star' look and feel to his performances, making him seem like anybody. Craig Robinson has stole a many of scenes in a many of shows and movies and finally here he gets some quality screen time. His timing and demeanor makes almost every joke he delivers work to perfection. Rob Corddry gets to play the asshole friend... you know him or her. Robinson and Cusack explain it quite well in the film as 'he's that asshole friend, but he's our asshole'. We've all got somebody in our lives kind of like that. However Corddry is that guy on crack, but as over the top as he gets, it really works out. And lastly Clark Duke who we'll see in "Kick Ass" and I remember for "Sex Drive", a very funny and underrated comedy. Duke is the rational one not from the 80's and thus is trying to get things steady so he actually ends up existing still.

In present times it can be said that all four of these guys lives suck. They are bored, lifeless, existing in their own selves for the most part and slowly going through their paces. That is until Conddry's character Lou attempts to kill himself. The boys then decide to take a trip back to where they had some of the best times of their lives only to find out that for the most part the town is boarded up and the ski lodge they loved so much has pretty much become a wreck. However after a long bout of crap, the hot tub beings working, they begin drinking and an accident launches them back to 1986, the weekend so much happened for them all.

Ok, now to the our concept of time travel via this film. From what it appears I would say we're dealing with "Back to the Future" logic. Meaning if you change too much of the past then you mess you the future. Now how said hot tub time machine got there and what not is never explained or anything like that. All that is known is that after the boys reach 1986, Chevy Chase appears from time to time as a maintenance man trying to fix it and get them back to 2010.

In 1986 however they were all in their prime and loving life for the most part. Partying, hooking up, the whole nine. But they must attempt to stay on that path and what they did back then to ensure their futures... although one would wonder since their futures suck... might they want to try something different. This leads to several funny and well thought out sequences that sometimes don't feel like they're here to tell the story, but just here to tell a joke. And it works well. The soundtrack is another point of notice where they use a lot classic 80's tunes at just the right moment and know just how to make a funny moment funnier. Seriously anyone doubting this movie is an idiot; I'd very much like to see it again and see if it holds well as that was an issue of mine I had with last years "The Hangover". A film that I did very much like, but works best on that first viewing and then again when you haven't watched it for a while and have forgotten some of the gags. "Hot Tub Time Machine" on the other hand has that creative edge that often makes repeat viewings work right away like Edgar Wright films for me.

If you love movies of the 80's you can't pass this up either because it's a concept that would've been down right perfect for that decade. Something so over the top and absurd that could be made absolutely hilarious in the right hands. But it's here now, so don't miss while you've got the chance.

The Road review

I've found that allowing things based on the work of author Cormac McCarthey to sit in you a while tends to help with the expressing of feelings about his work. When I first watched the Coen brothers "No Country for Old Men" I waited nearly a week before writing the review. This is McCarthey's second film adaptation of late, but he's had at least three, the oldest being "All the Pretty Horses" which was... umm... well I wasn't so keen on it. "The Road" is definitely one that's had me swinging both ways and I have read the book before seeing the film although it was some years ago; probably around the height of the books success.

As a story "The Road" is harrowing and beautiful. It's a fathers love of his son despite how horrid the world is or rather what's left of it. It's also his selfishness in wanting to continue when things are as bad as they are. The juxtaposition of such was that of his wife played in flashbacks by Charlize Theron. She in fact never wants to give birth to their son and after he's become a young boy, doesn't want him to have endure the horrors that world has to offer. Viggo Mortensen plays the father known simply as 'Man' in the story and film just as Kodi Smit-McPhee is known as 'Boy'. Both of their performances are brave and strong as they have to be. We are with them constantly and never leave them and with that we see that love and respect that they have for one another. At the same time you also see their degree of clashing where Man thinks that there is no good left and for Boy to think that it would be the death of them both.

In addition to that "The Road" offers a great score by Nick Cave and Warren Ellis who also scored "The Assassination of Jesse James" and director John Hillcoat's film prior to this, the gritty Australian western "The Proposition". Hillcoat is a fantastic director as tends to tell his stories less through words and more through the power of the imagine on screen. "The Proposition" is an amazing picture on a dozen levels and one is the beautiful and foreboding imagery. The harsh and yet magnificent look of the Outback and the nasty, gritty people doing deeds within it. "The Road" has many strong images as well. Hillcoat gives us some of those shots of gray, dead cities and burning buildings, but he also shows us other areas. He shows us the dying forests and oceans. Takes us to places less seen in post apocalyptic films.

But here is where we come to a wall. Many people will not like this film and it's perfectly understandable. And I'll go one step further and deliver this nugget out there, the film has no climax. This is not an action film or a thriller. It's a survival and family drama in a setting we're not too use to seeing that type of film in. Thus to some extent what you see is what you get. You get two people walking and living and occasionally having to forcefully deal with the devils of the new world, but more so deal with the biggest enemy which is the elements. Keeping warm and dry and not starving the death or allowing their own paranoia consume them. It's really an interesting story, but I should say know what it is you're walking into first.

For me "The Road" has many strong elements and themes and I'm not quite ready to take them all in just yet. For me I think I need to get a little of them unresolved exciting post apocalypse out of my system since last year that didn't happen. So here's hoping the Hughes brothers and "The Book of Eli" can provide that (which from what I've heard they do). So for the time being I feel a bit cold on "The Road". I feel like down the line my feelings might strengthen, but not particularly lessen, but I'll need time. It's something I'd go back to see on DVD and see how I feel then knowing what I know now. And yes it is somewhat difficult to write a review on a film when you're feelings towards it are as clouded as this. I kind of wish there was 2 3/4 I could throw out, but that doesn't work with my set up. The last time I felt this way about a film was Terrence Malik's "The New World" and with time it has made me look upon it much more pleasingly then it did upon that first viewing. So who knows, in a few months I may re-review "The Road" and see how I feel then. But for now I'm going with this...

"The Road" ** 1/2 out of ****

The Men Who Stare At Goats & Planet 51 mini reviews

"The Men Who Stare At Goats" *** out of ****

A prime example of just an overall great story. I've never read, but I have heard of the book and the bizarre stated to be true story of the Army's push for a new type of solider. In the past things like Remote Viewing research has been released by the government, so it is indeed possible that this story is fact. George Clooney plays yet another great character, Lynn who is one of the best psychic soldiers to have existed and Ewan McGregor plays the reporter in the middle east searching for a story and finding Lynn. The two men's exploits are funny, but sometimes go on a bit too long and a lot of times their material is upstaged by the flashbacks ofthe 70's with Jeff Bridges Kevin Spacey and Clooney's characters. This was the directorial debut of actor/writer/producer Grant Henslov ("Good Night, and Good Luck") and it's a good jumping point. I will say there is one scene that is perhaps one of the funniest things I've seen all year, but it's not one that you would expect. Probably why it was so funny.

"Planet 51" ** out of ****

This is an example of a harmless kids film that had it been properly done could've been great, but instead takes all the easy roads and fails. Dwayne Johnson, Justin Long, Gary Oldman and Jessica Biel voice the characters in the 50's, B-movie, science fiction styled film. About ten minutes into the movie I came to the conclusion that this was from the same makers of "Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius", a animated film I actually hated (and still kinda do). "Planet 51" isn't that bad, but it's flat and simple minded. Kids might like it, but parents are likely to be bored with it.

The Fourth Kind review

"The Fourth Kind" is probably the best made for Fox TV movie since the 90's. Oh wait they stopped making those didn't they. Well then I guess it'll have to settle for the best Sy-fy channel movie to date instead. And no that's not really that good of a thing. "The Fourth Kind" is a great example of having all the elements needed for a scary and interesting mystery thriller involving alien abduction, but doesn't use most of them the right way and some of them used too much. Also it's an example of marketing a film in the mystery genre and how people decide what to see based on knowing whats going to happen. This went up against Richard Kelly's "The Box", which hasn't faired well box office wise. Many say it's because the trailer seemed to point to one simple aspect, which is how these movies get promoted nowadays. It turns out people don't really want surprises in films anymore, just more or less whatever they expect and know going into it. "The Fourth Kind" marketed is a great example of showing it's best and only tricks before the show so that people don't have to be worried about wondering what might happen next. What terrible thing that would be.

Like "Paranormal Activity", the film shows 'real' footage and claim the movie is based on true events (it's not by the way). So it's inter cut throughout with pieces of the 'real' footage and scenes from the reenactment which stars Milla Jovovich as the lead Dr. Abigal Tyler. This is her first non-gun toting flick after a long string of them... most were quite sucky, but she's fun to watch so she often gets a pass. Jovovich isn't really a bad actress either (see "Dummy" for proof) and here she almost is able to pull off the character, but some of the emoting doesn't feel quite right. The same can be said with the person playing the real Abigal Tyler (which according to the films credits IS Abigal Tyler). Her frail size and pale skin tone makes her quite believable as do many of the stock footage scenes. However at times her slow speech and uneven emotions get old and a bit boring and so does the movie.

The real problem is that it's made with a lot of style that it destroys most possibilities of it being scary and just feels like a really rushed episode of "24" with aliens. They place in interesting clues and notions that would include extraterrestrial abductions and things of that nature early on for the build up, but mess it all up by getting the wrong vibe and atmosphere and in a movie like this those things are absolutely critical. I cite "The Mothman Prophecies". I still like it despite it's flaws and slow points, but that's because it has a build, makes small connections that lead to bigger ones and it's tone is always foreboding. There's not one scene of bizarre actions or stories being told in that film that doesn't have a moodiness to it. All this said "The Fourth Kind" has two great scenes. And I mean great as in they would've been perfection had they not used them on the trailer.

Both scenes of bliss are of the 'real' footage and involve the channeling of an entity from within the human body. The sad part is that both scenes are displayed on the trailer and had I not expected it I imagine that those scenes would've been really jaw dropping. The blurred image is great, but what is being said is much better and creepier. In fact you say that within "The Fourth Kind" is a better movie trying to break free that adds up and feels complete and scary. One that picks one of the two types of film that it is to go with instead of sitting on the fence. I'm not saying it's as bad as something like "White Noise" (which suffered several of the same problems and more), but it's a sure fire disappointment to people who like UFO or abduction stories (like myself).

Finally I just have to stress that this could've been something. It's a picture chalked full of potential scares, mystery and intrigue that wastes 90% of it on extended shots of peoples reactions to something that's maybe, but usually isn't impressive. I think writer-director Olataunde Osunsanmi (who also stars in the film as himself in interviews with Dr. Tyler) may have the right idea story wise (I stress the word may), but definitely does not have the right idea directorial wise. Next time someone attempts to make a movie on this particular subject they show very much look into what makes these stories and mysteries interesting and frightening before letting cameras roll.

"The Fourth Kind" ** out of ****

2012 review

Witness the biggest, craziest and possibly most entertaining disaster picture ever made. Co-writer-director Roland Emmerich the creator of such mega destruction blockbusters as "Independence Day", "Godzilla" and "The Day After Tomorrow" has for my money hit the nail on the head by forgoing most seriousness for melodrama and over the top scenes of massive Earth annihilation. In fact I'd say this is his best picture since his Revolutionary war, Mel Gibson film "The Patriot" and his best paced movie to date. Further more his addition of stronger actors like John Cusack, Thandie Newton, Danny Glover, Oliver Platt, Chiwetel Ejiofor and Woody Harrelson kind of add to the ridiculous, cartoony sci-fi fun of it all.

But let me stress a couple of very important things. First off this movie is in no way a reflection of what will happen in 2012, just an entertaining piece of a huge maybe, if anything that would happen hype machine. Second is that Emmerich has now cemented himself as the Sam Raimi of the disaster film genre. Where before he would go as bug nuts as he wanted and attempted to make a serious picture with serious tones, here he just cuts loose and has fun. Sure there are sub-plots there to put on those old heartstrings and make you care about humanity (as he does have a lot of humanity in his pictures unlike Michael Bay), but the main set of characters make you like or simply enjoy them because they are who they are. Like John Cusack! He's snarky and fun to watch on screen in general so throwing him in a scene out running an erupting volcano is perfection! Chiwetel Ejiofor is still one of my favorite actors to watch because no matter what he's in he will act the SHIT out of it, just because he can. So why not pair him up with Thandie Newton and give him to 'emotional' speeches about peoples right to fight for their survival?

So with all that said, yes the script and dialogue is often hokey. Mainly in the first half of the film. When we reach the second half which is when things really change into (in my opinion) a much more original and entertaining concept, you've got lots of ethos, but it works. The budget for this mega picture is idea mega at $250 million... let that settle a second. However every cent is seen on screen. This ain't no cheap looking flick like "Spider-Man 3". And there are some scenes in here that really question whether it was CGI or practical effects or a mix of both. And this is especially important after Emmerich's last picture "10,000 BC" which is definitely the worst in his filmography on just about every level, including some very poor CGI. In "2012" though he more than makes up for it and provides sequence after sequence of glowing chaos that we're allowed to savor.

As I watched "2012" I also realized how much better of an overall action sci-fi picture is was than "Transformers 2". Mainly because this wasn't taking itself to deadly serious and mixing it with some pretty lackluster jokes. And I'm saying this after 'enjoying' that film. But all negative thoughts aside "2012" is about as great of an adventure picture of this size can get without being great. Had it's script been better I'd say it would've been great. In any case see it on the biggest screen, with the loudest sound system you can. See it and laugh and be marveled by immense, German engineered disaster and fun.

"2012" *** 1/2 out of ****

New trailer leaked for James Cameron's Avatar

Okay, that first trailer was a bit underwhelming. That we can probably all agree upon. Personally I dug it, but not in the way or as much as I assumed I would. So apparently next week theatrically there will be a new 3 minute and 18 second trailer.

And as you can figure out from my title, the internet as grabbed it a bit early. How is it? It makes me want that goddamned movie right now. This is somewhat more of what I was looking for in the teaser. It displays what seems to be the main plot and showcases some of the new CG technology Cameron designed for this film. Not only that, but this is the first 3D release film I've been pumped to see since "Beowulf". Granted that was a let down, but as time as passed I like it more. Mainly because I went in expecting greatness and found it a bit dull and because I wasn't impressed with the 3D. Also I love the fact that they really like the new teen audience know who the fuck James Cameron is and why he's important. This man created 'Terminator', 'Aliens', 'Terminator 2', 'True Lies' and yes his mega picture Oscar destroyer 'Titanic' and don't you forget it.

See what I speak of.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhkPpcbu-Ts&feature=player_embedded

I hate that I can't place the trailer on my page and I hate that the images are at times too dark due to the shit-cam quality, but I love this trailer and I think FOX and Cameron have finally hit their promotional target.

NOTE: Probably no reviews this week. I refuse to pay actual money to watch a 'Saw' film so if anything I'll watch it online. I may not like them, but I will educate myself on them so I can bitch... bitch while informed. Aside from that possibly I'll get to see "The Hurt Locker", which has been one of the best reviewed films of the year and did great for a low release film in the summer. After that I may do some Halloween horror movie blogging for kicks.